The holiday season is coming up, and for many single people the holiday season includes an increase in dates. People are feeling warm and fuzzy, love is in the air, and everything seems more romantic when there’s snow falling. But what happens when you go on a first date, and it doesn’t turn into a second date? You thought the date went really well, and find yourself surprised when the other person doesn’t feel the same. So what could have gone wrong? We’ve got 5 potential reasons that you didn’t land the second date.
- You brought up your ex.
If you’re newly single, or just getting out of a divorce, your ex may be on your mind. While this is completely normal, trust us when we say that your date doesn’t want to hear about your ex on a first date. Next time, leave the ex-talk at home.
- You weren’t 100% there.
It’s easy to let previous date experiences, your to-do list, or what’s going on at home, impact a date. Although you may think you’re disguising your wandering mind from your date, most people can tell if you aren’t truly listening to what they are saying. Instead of thinking about what went wrong on your last date, or what you’ve got going in the morning, try listening to your date, and ask follow up questions. Doing this will show that you’re listening and that you’re interested in what your date is saying.
- You asked too many questions.
While we’re on the topic of asking questions, it is possible to ask too many questions. Asking question after question after question can leave your date feeling as though they are on an interview and not a date. It’s important to find the fine line of asking questions to show your interest, while also letting them hear about you. A great date includes both people sharing a little bit about themselves.
- The date lasted 3 hours when it should have only lasted 2.
We’ve all heard of dates that last until the early hours because the two people simply couldn’t end the date. While this is great if the two of you are both equally interested, but the majority of first dates don’t last 6,7, or even 8 hours. First dates should leave you wanting more, and should, in a sense, feel like you’re leaving in the middle of the date, vs awkwardly leaving when the conversation has dried up.
- There wasn’t a spark.
Simply put, one or both of you weren’t feeling the other person. That’s completely normal. You don’t have to love every person you go on a date with. Sometimes there is something you don’t like about the other person, or that they don’t like about you, and it shows in your chemistry. It might have been something little, or a bigger red flag, but either way, it’s good to know that on the first date rather than waste both of your time.