It may surprise you to know that many second marriages end in divorce. Between the financial stress which often accompany a second marriage, and the number of people who are typically involved, a second divorce can be difficult to maintain.
Now that we’ve scared you from ever wanting a second marriage, let’s talk about the pitfalls, how to avoid them, and in turn, avoid a second divorce.
It’s Easier to Get a Divorce When You’ve Already Been Through One. The first time a person gets married, they most likely never thought they would get divorced. They went into the marriage thinking it would last forever, and that they would do anything to keep the marriage alive. Once you’ve been through a divorce it’s easier to know when to get out, and how the process works.
Think about it like this; The first marriage is typically a huge celebration. Big ceremony, large group of people, over the top celebration of love. If that marriage ends in divorce, and the person is lucky enough to get married a second time, the second marriage ceremony is often subdued. It’s a smaller group of people and less hoopla. The same is true for a second divorce. Although noteworthy, it’s not usually as big of a deal as the first divorce.
Financial Stresses Are Usually Higher. The first divorce can sometimes be costly. Between legal fees, and learning how to survive on one income, a second marriage can bring with it some financial stress. Having this type of stress is hard, and if both parties are entering into a marriage with financial stress, it may cause more issues as the marriage progresses.
The Idea of a Typical Marriage Could Be Different. After the first divorce, you will have to change your idea of what a typical marriage looks like. It’s no longer, the two people, their children and pets. A second marriage typically includes children, two sets of exes, and juggling who gets the children on what days. The second marriage doesn’t always look like the marriage children often grow up imagining. Once you’ve realized that it’s ok for your life to not turn out how you imagined, it’s easier to continue to break from what you expected.
More People Are Involved. If your first marriage included children, then chances are your second marriage will include many more people who are involved in your life. You might have your ex, your children, a partner your ex has chosen, your new spouse, his/her children, his/her ex, anyone their ex has chosen to be with, and more. With more people, come more opinions. The more people you have involved in a second marriage, the more complicated it can get.
While there are many other areas which can cause a divorce, knowing these potential areas of conflict can help make your next marriage a success.